Wednesday, May 03, 2017

Feedback loop

Anxiety is self-fulfilling.

I was dropping things—more than usual—and it was frustrating. Then it was anxiety-inducing because it reminded me of the injury and that made me anxious. The more anxious I got the more my hands trembled and more my hands trembled the more anxious I got.

I wanted to try and put the replacement bell on the bike but I dropped the screwdriver three times. In the end I walked away because it was too frustrating.

That’s life with a psychological injury—you suffer a symptom which gives you anxiety and your anxiety makes that symptom worse.

But it’s better dread than dead and I should be dead.

Oddly, that does not make me anxious.

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