Saturday, November 14, 2015

Paperus Interruptus Reload

theboy has always attempted to interrupt paper reading time—where I stretch out on the floor with the weekend SMH and The Saturday Paper—and uses a variety of means to do so. Most commonly it's him leaping out and onto the paper then dancing on top of it as I lie there.

It's extremely irritating. 

Today, as I lay on the floor with my paper, he crab walked over my head, grinding his arse across my balding dome and then at the midpoint squeezed one out. It burped atop my head and floated its noisome ill around me. 

You have to hand it to him. For a sequel to tap dancing on my paper, toes flailing five cm from my nose, a ground-out-on-a-head fart is a good one. 

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