Thursday, October 08, 2015

More present, am happier

We sometimes listen to books on CD on the drive to work and over a series of recent drives we listened to parenting CDs. They talked about the need to be more emotionally available. To recognise that our kids are always going to need us and that even if that's irritating when it happens they still need us and it's better to just muck in when it occurs—with the benefit that you have a richer, more fulfilling connection because you're truly engaged. 

So instead of marching straight into the shed and riding the exercise bike when I get home I hang out and play like mucking about with dinosaurs, kicking a bouncy ball into the trampoline ring and take-a-turn story telling. 

Then, if I miss bath-time because of the ride, then that's okay because I've been there for him in the moment when I got home.

I've tried it with other interactions—to be available in the moment—and it's helped with that too. I feel happier for it as well.

Though I have to admit it's when you're being talked to when you clearly want to just work that is the hardest to bear. Typically after a couple of minutes I can't stand it and even as we talk I restart typing—down to one third speed perhaps—because I am just that fucking awesome.

That's the flip-side of super burdens, baby, super powers. 


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