The Fat Controller in disguise!

theBoy is having an early spaghetti dinner. That means he has an early bath. I've run it for him and it awaits his presence.

As the bath was filling I ducked into the end room and ferreted through the odds-and-sods stationary drawer—filled with the detritus of two public servants who moved several different times. I grabbed a post-it note and a black pen and got to work crafting his appearance concealer.

The Fat Controller is now on the shelf to the upper right of the sink, a fashionable false beard protecting his identity!

I give theBoy ten seconds before he finds it. 

UPDATE: It was three seconds—'There he is! He's got a false beard!'

He made me drop the false beard down the drain. He found it disquieting.