Implants and the human rocking chair

It's a weird feeling to have body implants. Yep, plural. One weirdness, for example, is my being seemingly able to sense my hip replacement.  A band of cold ache runs up though my left thigh and deep into my arse cheek (1). It's an uncomfortable sensation and I get paranoid it's the sign of an infection; the main thing that can go wrong in the first year post-op.

Added to that goodness my bones creak and crack with any movement, and it's noticeably audible to anyone in earshot. I feel like a mechanical marionette and sound like a rocking chair. One in need of a good dose of lubricant. And sometimes when I rise I fire off like an old man on a 'woe is me' moan.

But hey, better limping than limp, eh? Indeed. Rock on, Canberra

(1) Sorry, again, Aussie Hot Boys, for the mislead.