Sometimes I irk theBoy to the point that he yells 'I AM GOING TO BITE YOU!' then dives at my chest, jaws slavering.
So I got him to agree if I ever irked him to the point of inciting mastication that he should have a word he could yell to indicate his distress and let me know to back off.
In deference to the fine work of The Family Guy I suggested banana. Suggestion accepted.
It seemed to work except he started dropping it for more steadily mundane matters. Like being lightly prodded to move or asked to not smash his grubby hands at Daddy's newly arrived Knights of the Dinner Table.
'Banana! Banana! Banana!' he chanted, over and over.
I'd had enough.
'That's it, Chooky,' I yelled over the top of his banana chanting, 'your banana-use privileges have been suspended due to over-use!'
Without missing a beat—a single beat, mind—he simply changed the chant.
'Apple! Apple! Apple!' he sang-chanted. 'The new word is apple!'
There's no defeating him.
Later he turned 'I AM GOING TO BITE YOU!' into a game where I was lying on the couch and he was balanced on my body, pinning my left arm to my chest. His body was arced and stiffened, his jaws agape, and I could only just use my right hand to lift his little rigid body high enough he couldn't actually gnash on my chest. I laughed so hard I wept, especially when he added a hint of sibilant hiss.
He is the funniest little man I've ever met. And he's four!