Monday, August 29, 2011

I'm outside

It's the dying gasp of Winter and I am outside. I am tapping away on Mr Lappy while theBoy sits inside watching a Play School dinosaur-themed DVD. We'd just finished a bout of rolly-game and Humpty and Stumpty that went for about twenty minutes. He only cried twice. That's pretty good for me I think.

The trampoline is awesome. I know it's supposed to be one-at-a-time and the weight limit is less than what I am. But I don't bounce. I merely lie full-length on my stomach or back. I prefer back, though the sun remains in my eyes until about 4 pm when the roof shades the trampoline. If I am on my stomach my top tends to ride up and my flabby stomach presses flatly along the taut mesh. Like I am in some sort of S&M-wear shop and I am trying on one of those man-corset things designed to cinch in the gut.

Because nylon is used in the mesh-weave then there's a lot of static electricity. If you go near any of the metal bits of the unit then you tend to discharge it with an audible pop. theBoy's hair sprouts from his head like from when you mucked around with a Van de Graff generator in year nine science class (2).

My hair is nice and short at the moment. But I don't doubt that if I had gone the shaggy mad scientist balding in the middle but long around it look that I'd be sprouting like a ch...ch...chia! pet.

Anyway, the trampoline is an absolutely awesome outside item. And the pergola we had put in that I am tapping from under is likewise awesome.

However while it maybe the dying gasp of Winter this is Canberra. So the cold still has some bite to it. I'm going back in. Best rest assured I will return. Being outside is the shizzle! (3)

UPDATE: It's the day after the initial post. I'm back outside while theWife has her freak on going for a lounge room make-over. There's still a bit of glare under the pergola because the roofing material is transparent (with a UV filter). So it makes the screen a little hard to see. However I've just solved it as an issue. How? Wearing a hat. I rule.

(1) The rolly-game. I lie on my stomach and he stands at the rim of the trampoline. I then straight-body roll to try and catch him. It means rolling back-and-forth and angling my body so I can better target him. I grab him then pull into the middle for a wriggling cuddle. Then he either escapes or demands 'let's go to sleep' and he lies on me in the centre, his eyes closed, and we enjoy as momentary suspended-sunbathe.
(2) My science teacher kicked off sex-ed with a joke. 'What's got six legs and goes around in circles. A ewie!' Yes, I guess you had to be there.
He used to have a populated aquarium in his classroom. He suffered numerous incidents including chocolate milk poured in and a condom used as a net. The spermicide simply made the water cloudy and he had to clean it. Later some students bought him a bigger-than-the-other's fish. They gave it to him on a Friday. The next Monday when he walked in he found his tank empty of fish and the now-even-bigger fish lying on the floor. Yes, it had scarped all the other fish then suicide-leaped out of the tank. You can't make this shit up.
(3) When you have a most-excellent paving floored and pergola-covered area outside and a power supply you can plug your fucked-battery-possessing-laptop into.

No comments:

Post a Comment