Interior: Day, Barracks.
Two German soldiers are cleaning their kit.
HANZ: Ja, I do so like to do it. It’s like straight skipping
HANZ: Vhen is ze next time we get to step out?
FRUNTER reaches for a peace of paper. Atop the paper is a stylized pair of legs doing a goose step.
FRUNTER: You are not going to believe it. Guess.
HANZ: St. Freedenburg’s day?
HANZ: Vhat? But ze little children like to dance und prance alongside us!
FRUNTER: Apparently last year ve kicked too many down by accident. There was trampling.
HANZ: Surely Prussian Eyes Downcast Day vhere we keep our eyes on ze ground in deference to our betters.
FRUNTER: Nein. Zat was also cancelled from an appearance on Prussian Eyes Downcast Day. Zere were issues with looking where we were going. Ve ended up in a nunnery. Zere was ze nun…
HANZ: Ja, ze nun. Right in the middle of her wimple.
FRUNTER: Ja. Ze wimple.
HANZ: So vhat are zey saying. Vhen vill we goose step again?
FRUNTER smacks the paper.
FRUNTER: It says here … Hitler’s birthday, Hitler’s girlfriend’s day, Hitler’s dog’s day—
HANZ (interrupts): Vhat? For his dog? Dat spoiled schwinehund.
FRUNTER: Ja … in fact it is not to be used on any day not associated with ze Fuehrer ... and zere is none for ages!
HANZ: You know … if you take Hitler away from it … there is a total paucity of appropriate occasions for a goose step.
HANZ and FRUNTER look sad and peer into the distance.
Mournful German martial music - in - up - under.