I gave up dairy laced food I think about a week ago. Last night I partially relented. I had a little bit of grated Halloumi on our delish olive tomato pasta as cooked by theWife. No reaction - excellent - because apparently for some people with dairy intolerance then sheep / goats milk derived products don't cause a reaction. Duly noted. Even if Halloumi is fuck off expensive at about $5 for a 200 gram block.
Then I had some sorbet ... with a hint of cream from a cracked open box from our many boxes of lactose free cream we purchased when we thought it was Lactose Wot Done It.
Yeah ... pain lanced within 20 minutes. And of course in that time I'd had a second helping so when it did lance it was worse. Bloating, gas, cramping pains. That more than uncomfortable feeling that you want to pass out poop but if you try you got nuthin'.
Later, high on pain meds, I though 'what the fuck, I've already dialed back the pain. Why not indulge?' So I had some cereal with proper milk and a dash of the cream. Yeah, there was pain from it – and the aforementioned gas bloats – but hey, like I said, already doing the good chemical business so it didn’t hurt as much.
Except of course meds wear off. Which they did when I awoke and … still in pain.
Damn you dairy! (shakes fist).
By the way, milk substitutes. On balance, having sampled a number of white milk impersonating liquids, I have to say ... milk ... there is no substitute.
There you go advertisers. I'm doing your job for you again. I except a fucking cheque this time.