By and large I am a safe driver. In that I stick to the speed limit and try to be considerate to other motorists - such as letting them in ahead of me so forth.
So it irks me when mofo fuckwits who are sharing the road with me break social conventions like not waving thanks when you let them in, or are speeding non indicating lane weaving sons of a motherless goat.
Like this fuckwit this morning. Weaving, speeding, not indicating. It got my gander up.
'YOU STUPID FUCKING DICKWAD MOTHER FUCK-'
At that point, my face slightly purpling with rage, my soliloquy was interrupted by a cough.
A great hunk of goob then sailed out of my mouth, turned like a half hearted tower diver, then landed on my seatbelt a'quivering.
Shame-faced, I had to scrape it onto my index finger and wipe it some place out of the way.
If only life was like TV where you could have another take.