Thursday, February 26, 2009

Sunlight smells like wet poo

Actually not real sunlight, since it's a wave/particle, though it does apparently have mass - so if it has mass in theory it should also have an odor. Since, after-all, when you want to sneeze, you look into the light. Ha!

But, that's neither here nor there. The Sunlight I refer to is the brand of cheap soap.

When I was a kid I had trouble controlling my bowels. On occasion I crapped myself. Even right up into early high school. Turns out I had IBS the whole time which explains much of it. My mother, rightly so, expressed the desire that soiled garments of that nature should be cleaned by the one that soiled them. Kind of a mash up of smelt it dealt it I guess.

Even now I can remember these horrid moments of my childhood of the incredibly embarrassing and disgusting job of applying a bar of soap to my shitty undies' gusset and trying to remove the stain.

Flash forward to a couple of weeks ago. We'd run out of soap and I was at the local IGA. There was some cheap soap so I got that. To tide us over until the next big shop.

Normally I enjoy new soap day. I was naked, ready to in the shower hop, and cracked the box.

The box of sunlight soap.

The exact same soap I used to clean the shit from my underdaks as a kid.

So cue the flood of memories linked to the smell of Sunlight. Horrible cringing painful memories of a horrible moment in life.

Hoo-fucking-ray.

So there you have it. Sunlight smells like wet poo. And always will ... for me at least.

5 comments:

  1. That was without a doubt one of the most unexpectedly touching things I have ever read.
    Bravo Mikey.

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  2. Ahhh .... I hesitate as this is going to be like the time I answered the astonishingly beautiful girl who pondered "why is the sky blue?" ... by telling her exactly why it is in fact blue.

    ie. a bit of a bubble burster (I've got a bit more successful with the ladies since though)

    But here goes :

    Sunlight - ie. photons - have zero mass.

    That's why they travel at the speed of light, nothing with mass can travel at the speed of light, everything without mass does.

    Photons, which is what light is made of, Have. No. Mass.

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  3. Ah but if light can be affected by gravity it therefore has to have a mass does it not?

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  4. Mikey: "Gravitation" by Wheeler, I reccommend it.

    Mass distorts space and photons follow the least action path in space (there's a short discussion of this in Feynman's lectures which is *really* well worth the read)

    But that's the answer that requires a lot of study.

    Shorter answer, there are formulations where photons have non-zero mass but they cause problems with other parts of physics and are much less tractable.

    Also, the photon has never been observed to have a non-zero mass and the lower limit is pretty low now.

    Ultra short answer: photons have zero mass and rhetoric doesn't change that. Reformulating physics from the ground up might, but word games won't.

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  5. ... I'm an arts student ...

    ReplyDelete