Saturday, February 07, 2009

Man Hands Redux

In the public service you're tied into performance agreements. Every few months you dust off the last one, confirm you met (circumstances permitting) your agreed outcomes, and either get approved for a pay rise or denied.

As you may recall I had a somewhat grabby temp supervisor last year - who at one point belly jiggled me. Yes, that's right. Belly jiggled.

As I am in a new area I needed my old 'what I did in my holidays' signed off. So I made a time with man hands.

Somewhat creepily we met in an empty wing of offices - yet to be settled by incoming staff. Just me and him. He was on the phone when he waved me to take a seat. During waiting for him to finish his mobile call, I yawned because I was tired - and a little bored I admit.

What did man hands do?

He reached out and patted my knee.

What. The. Fuck?

Unless he's been in a Pavlovian Clockwork Orange esq experiment where he was forced to watch men yawning and patted a mannikin's knee lest he suffer a mild shocking I cannot fathom how my yawning engendered a knee pat.

Anyway, all signed off. Before the meeting he said 'no worries mate, I'll tick you the highest one.'

Did he? No, second highest. There's no difference - I still get my pay raise - but still. That was weird. Why be enthused about giving me top dollar then ping me a silver instead of gold?

Bah, who am I to fathom the mind of man hands?

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