Well after five years of trying, theWife and I succeeded in birthing ourselves a baby.
theBoy arrived via a semi-emergency C-section late last night after theWife's labour wasn't progressing as speedily as hoped for. He's a small baby due to late term complications but he should flesh out in the next few weeks to normal size.
theWife is a bit sore but dealing well with post birthing. She even managed to walk around a bit this pm after getting sliced above her pubis less than 12 hours before.
He had to go in one of those humidicrib things but will be let out soon. And he will prob be in his new home soon.
However from the top of my head, here's some fleeting highlighted memories and advice RE IVF pregnancy and birthing a baby.
A) Ultrasound jelly is nontoxic. It tastes purple.
B) When driving your baggie of fresh jizz to the clinic note they actually allow an hour to get it to them. They say half an hour so you don't dawdle. On more than one occasion I ran a red light, a fresh cup'o'creamyme in my top pocket, and indeed fish tailed around corners to get it there (since I refused to beat off at the clinic ... whose magazines a friend wryly noted, included a Golf mag).
C) Hearing your baby's heartbeat for the first time is kewl. You can fully create doosh doosh music to it.
D) When meeting your obstetrician for the first time don't say 'if theWife has to go under can you like add stuff like gills?' then make flapping motions at the side of your neck whilst gulping like a goldfish. He will think you're a fuckwit.
E) Holy fucking shit we're parents. That just blows my mind.
Oh, this is me wearing scrubs. The largest set they had. They were so tight I couldn't wear a shirt underneath. It looks like the sprayed on costume belonging to a super-villain known only as "The Surgeon".